"Blood"

Big News... my blog has been nominated for an award! Hell yeah. The "You-Have-Too-Much-Time-on-Your-Hands-Jon-Get-a-Life" award. There is but one nominee. But knowing my luck of late I won't even win that.

Saturday's match was cancelled. Again. Hatfield Broad Oak couldn't get a team due to injuries, people working and generally being hopeless cases. So I turned out for the Sunday XI (with Andy Silkstone skippering) and we played away to Wethersfield - the first time Great Canfield had played them.

On the way to the ground I stopped behind Trevor to help attend to a motorcyclist who was injured. Get this - 60mph down the High Roding to Dunmow B road and - smack - a pheasant (yes, a pheasant) flies out right into the biker's visor. Except the biker had his visor up. Messy - a lot of blood and one very dead pheasant. We called a paramedic, cleaned him up and used his mobile to call his mate and girlfriend. He was in a bit of shock (but not as much as the pheasant) and lost a bit of blood due to a broken nose. Like an ancient soothsayer I read the entrails of the pheasant positive in the knowledge that our good Samaritan act would deliver instant karma.

5 hours later and we are getting stuffed at Wethersfield. Small ground, uncut outfield, dead wicket. Paul Lucas dives to stop a boundary. The ball bounces, rears up and SMACK! broken nose number 2 for t heday. That's karma for you. It IS amazing how much blood streams out of your nose, don't you think? Dazed and confused he wondered off leaving a pool of blood on the square... which acted as a useful reference point for the sub fielder ("just to the left of the blood stain, mate - yep - lovely").

It was a timed game and we were never in the running. Could have held out for the draw except the middle and late order batted as we always do.... badly. By the end I had had enough. I should have stayed at home.

Man of the Match: Ali Ross for bowling tight and opening the batting to give us hope
Mug of the Match: Me - for dropping a skier, bowling like a dead pheasant and scoring the sum total of.... 2
Hero of the Match: Paul Lucas for batting last with a broken nose


Next week we have a 20: Twenty game on Friday against Dunmow (yawn - them AGAIN) and on Saturday we are at home to Newport Grammar. THIS MATCH IS A 1PM START.

Charlie has organised this fixture and is doing tea. Such a nice lad... for a Big Girls Blouse. As an established Canfield regular who will be turning out for Newport, Charlie will have something to prove (such as bowling at the Sat XI's skipper's head). So more blood on the way then.

Sorry the blog is late this week but I've been running around like a headless pheasant all week.

Until next time

Jon "The Preecher" Priest