"Nets"

JP: You okay for Saturday, chap?

Clint: I can play, yeah. It's Gabriel's birthday party but the missus says I can play if I want..

JP: Sarah said that?

Clint: Yeah

JP: Those were her exact words - if you want?

Clint: Yeah

JP: Let me enlighten you. 'If you want' means absolutely no chance

Clint: She said I could play...

JP: Call me on Monday and let me know


Welcome to the start of a new season. As you can see, very little has changed. Our 2nd net of the season last Sunday at The Park was reasonably well attended and the sun rose on a new dawn at GCCC. And everyone did okay with bat and ball. Panther's an interesting one; Arthur Conan Doyle (he of Sherlock Holmes fame) argued once that the brain's capacity was finite. With any new knowledge gained, the brain must lose an equal and equivalent amount of knowledge to make room. So we when we saw him batting passably well in the net we knew his bowling would desert him. And it did. Well done mate for bowling the ball IN the net occasionally. Ho-ho.

Paul STILL doesn't move his feet at the crease and JW looks surprised every time he hits the thing. Andy looked the class bat he is. Jamie was ring-rusty. I of course, was spectacular. In my imagination that is. Mitch (who is 17 by the way) bowled quick and smacked a few (mostly off me). I bowled too short. Clint was our bowling pick and insisted on wearing his rugby shirt to nets (with a no. 18 on it - his batting average - har). Welcome to Pete the Kiwi vet who will be one of new players this season. Trevor also came up wearing his Sunday best walking the dog.... we are SO professional.

So it's Dunmow AWAY this Saturday for our first game of the season. Match is at 2pm. Be there at 1.45pm. Here's the team and likely batting line up (I have put amusing nick names in brackets)

Mike Emery (Super Mike)
Ali Ross (Super Ali)
Andy Davies (Super Andy)
Trevor Beeston (Super Trev)
Jamie Halls (Super Jamie)
Panther (Panther)
JP (Preacher)
Angus Rayner (Super Gus)
John Williams (JW)
Paul Lucas (Super Luke-y)
Robert Halls (Super Rob)

No Clint you notice. Funny that.

Due to popular demand I bring you the welcome return of Captain Blog's Absentee Rating system for players who couldn't make it. We have a 5 ***** rating system thus:


***** Choosing curtains with the missus/buying shoes/etc
**** Having to work at the weekend
*** A small niggle/injury/cough/etc
** Family engagement
* Hungover

Bomber haa his kids christening and its a a big family deal so fairy nuff. Steve Oakey has his bro down ('been arranged ages Jon', etc) for that a **. Mitch is playing for his school and is so excused. Bretty has kanckered his shoulder and has a sick note until further notice. Which leaves Clint - a definite ***** for even thinking he could play.

Dunmow will be up for it. Keen as mustard. It's a pre-season friendly for them and they will put out their 2nd XI. I do so hate them. Well not really. But like your bigger older brother who puts his outstretched hand on you forehead whilst you are trying to punch him, Dunmow 'like to take it easy on us'. Okay so they're the better team. And it's at their ground. And their players have much better nick names than us - like 'Spider' and 'Muscrat' and 'Bingo' or whatever. But I think we can get a draw. Good track you see.... win the toss, we bat first, post 250-265 and let them chase. Their ego will get the better of them and our slow bowlers (which is all of our attack obviously) will frustrate them into hitting out. Should be all over in time for Doctor Who.

Ali - please keep off the quality wines on Friday.

See you all Saturday. Here we go again. I love this job..........



Preacher